We’ve all heard it hundreds of times before… “You just need to be more confident!” Unfortunately, this kind of unsolicited advice doesn’t generally come with a set of instructions as to HOW to accomplish that task. Not to worry, I’ve got you covered. Here are my top tips on how to look, feel, and showcase confidence in your daily life.
First, let’s discuss what it LOOKS like to be confident. From the outside, a person who has a sense of self-assuredness will hold themselves tall. They will walk with their head held high, sit up properly, and retain good posture. These physical traits let people around you know that you aren’t trying to cower into your shell, but you are willing to be seen by all. Next up is eye contact. You’ll never meet a confident person who isn’t willing to look you straight in the eyes. It shows a lack of fear or intimidation of the person across from you, and it’s honestly just polite when you’re getting involved socially. No one wants to talk with someone who can’t even look at them. It’s equally important to speak clearly and at an appropriate volume, so you don’t get drowned out by those around you. Enunciate your words, and be willing to speak up in conversation. In group settings, things can get convoluted quickly when everyone is talking, so it’s very important to make sure you can be heard amidst the chaos.
Now you look the part, but how can you make yourself FEEL confidence internally? That’s easy. Confidence actually stems from competence. This means that the more you do/understand something, the more comfortable you will come across when it comes up. Socially, this just means that you are well-practiced. If you don’t have confidence in approaching strangers, it’s something you need to work on every day. Create a set schedule of how many approaches you will do daily, and stick to that promise. The more you do it, the less uncomfortable it will be, and your confidence will drastically increase in that area over time.
Finally, we’ve hit the point of learning to showcase your new confidence to others. This is more of a long-term commitment, which makes it the most difficult task of all. Being known as a confident person comes with its own set of requirements. The first is that you must be reliable. When you say you will do something, follow through on those words. Show up when expected, turn those dreams into reality, and be a constant presence in someone’s life. It’s a simple task, but one that many people have trouble succeeding in. Reliability not only showcases certainty, but it’s incredibly sexy! It’s also important that you believe in what you’re pitching.
In sales, that would mean you drink the company Kool-Aid and truly support the product you’re pushing. Socially, it’s knowing your own strengths and not shying away from showcasing them. Let them see your expertise. Believe in the things you say. Support your claims. If you can’t see the benefits you have to offer, it will be difficult for other people to see them. Along those same lines, it’s super important to speak truth always. This means being honest about who you are and what you want when you meet new people. Being self-assured in your desires not only vets people right off the bat, it also represents confidence in the life you’re trying to build.
Confidence comes naturally to a lot of people, but not to everyone. If you’ve struggled with self-certainty in the past, following these guidelines will not only help you feel better internally, it will also show those around you what a confident person you’ve become.